**Deploy for: Office “collab” days you didn’t agree to Group chat mutinies Coffee shops with too many influencers Family gatherings with “catch up” on the agenda**
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Low Signal Zone – Civilian Issue Hoodie
Low Signal Zone – Civilian Issue Hoodie
Drop the bars. Embrace the static.
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$65.00 USD
Regular price
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$65.00 USD
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Originally stitched from the remains of a Faraday cage and a Do Not Disturb sign stolen from the last unrenovated motel in Sector 7. Field tested in bunkers, nap pods, and blackout poetry slams.
Wear This When:
- Throw this hoodie on at work, coffee shops, airports, or any “team-building” activity. Best worn during meetings that should have been emails, Netflix marathons, and every Monday morning. Wear it as a warning: You’re offline, and that’s a feature.
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For People Who…
- **Pairs well with: Dark sunglasses Over-ear headphones The sacred art of not giving a shit Any space where you don’t want to be found**
Actual Shirt Stuff:
- -Gildan 18500: As thick as your boundaries, as soft as your “leave me alone” face. -Zero synergy, 100% self-preservation: Keeps colleagues and houseguests at bay. -Minimalist text: For introverts, anti-networkers, and people who can’t even.
Vibe Checks
- Ash Null. AGENT-404-OFFGRID. Remote Sector: “Nobody’s bothered me in three days. Might never come back.” – AGENT-404-OFFGRID Void Dex. AGENT-011-LOFI. Basement Division: “Wore it to the office. Nobody recognized me. Success.” – AGENT-011-LOFI Pix Static. AGENT-313-SLEEP. Sublevel D: “Battery life improved. Inner peace achieved. Hoodie confirmed operational.” – AGENT-313-SLEEP
Deborah Said That
I only answer calls from the void. Wear the hoodie, mute the world.
– Deborah, probably
