Customer-ish Support

CONTACT US

State your business, complaint, or existential crisis. We’ll respond between panic naps. No inspirational quotes. No live chat. Phil checks this inbox when Mercury’s in retrograde.

We only email back. No newsletters. No manifesting.
Helps us route it to the correct gremlin.
Is it an emergency? Really? If so, use subject: “Existential Meltdown”.
“Phil reads every third message. If you need instant support, try a snack and a nap.”