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Optimistically Pessimistic Tee

Optimistically Pessimistic Tee

It’s called balance.

Regular price $28.95 USD
Regular price $34.99 USD Sale price $28.95 USD
Sale Sold out
Shipping calculated at checkout.

Coined at a group therapy session where everyone agreed life was garbage, but hey—at least the snacks were good.

Color
Size

Why You Need This

  • Soft like your boundaries.
  • Pairs with ‘Do Not Disturb’.
  • Warning: may enable petty errands.
  • Built for camera-off days.

Fake Reviews

“HR said it was ‘unprofessional.’ I bought two more.”
— Petty & Employed
“Soft enough to replace my emotional support blanket.”
— Napfluencer
“Finally, a hoodie that matches my burnout.”
— Definitely Not HR

Specs (But Make It Petty)

🧼 Machine-Wash Goblin-Safe🧶 Airlume Combed Cotton📵 Do Not Disturb Ready🏷️ Tear-Away Label

Care Instructions, but honest

Official

  • Machine wash cold with like colors.
  • Only non-chlorine bleach.
  • Tumble low.
  • Cool iron if needed (not on print).

Unofficial

  • Camera-off Mondays approved.
  • If it touched a chair, it’s clean.
  • Science.
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