WORK SUCKS. AT LEAST YOUR HOODIE DOESN'T.
PROFESSIONAL BURNOUT, BUT MAKE IT FASHION.
SMALL TALK IS TERRORISM. OUR SHIRTS SAY IT LOUDER.
SNACK BREAKS > TEAM-BUILDING EXERCISES.
YES, YOU DO NEED ANOTHER SARCASTIC HOODIE.
OVER IT? SAME. ADD TO CART.
CORPORATE 'FAMILY' NOT INCLUDED WITH PURCHASE.
ONE DAY SHIPPING? NAH. ONE DAY NAP? ALWAYS.
YOUR BOSS WILL HATE IT. WHICH MEANS YOU NEED IT.
SYNERGY IS A CULT. BUY A SHIRT INSTEAD.
THERAPY IS EXPENSIVE. THIS SHIRT IS CHEAPER.
WEARABLE SARCASM FOR THE BURNOUT GENERATION.
FREE SHIPPING, UNLIKE YOUR STUDENT LOANS
Programmed for burnout.
First drafted in binary during a caffeine-fueled all-nighter. Leaked from the dark archives of a sarcastic chatbot gone rogue.
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“Comfort level: slept in it, wore it to brunch, nobody noticed.”
“Made me feel something. Might’ve been the cotton.”
“HR said it was ‘unprofessional.’ I bought two more.”
