💀
Deploy for:
Team calls you didn’t consent to
Family gatherings that demand “smiling”
Sunday nights, every night, and most mornings
When your only answer is “it depends”
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Do Not Disturb Existential Crisis In Progress Tee
Do Not Disturb Existential Crisis In Progress Tee
For when “out of office” doesn’t cut it.
Regular price
$35.00 USD
Regular price
Sale price
$35.00 USD
Unit price
/
per
Shipping calculated at checkout.
First issued during the Great 2017 Notification Meltdown, when 72% of Agents were found hiding in bathroom stalls, questioning the fabric of reality. The neon design? Inspired by the “open late” sign at the only diner left standing.
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Why You Need This
- Comes pre-shrunk (unlike your dreams).
- Perfect for ghosting brunch plans.
- Designed in dark mode. Tested on Zoom calls.
- ❌ Won’t fix your life. ✅ Will fix your outfit.
Fake Reviews
★★★★★
“Manifested petty, delivered comfy.”
★★★★★
“Finally, a hoodie that matches my burnout.”
★★★★★
“Soft enough to nap in during meetings.”
Specs (But Make It Petty)
☕ Cold Brew Compatible🧵 Bella + Canvas 3001🛡️ Slack-Ping Resistant🇺🇸 Printed in USA
Care Instructions, but honest
Official
Wash cold, inside-out. Tumble low or air dry. Do not iron the attitude.
Unofficial
Wear 3 days in a row. Febreze counts. Fold? Hard pass.
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