Currently Avoiding Everyone T-Shirt
Social battery: permanently in airplane mode.
Regular price
$44.99
Sale price
$29.99
Find your corresponding size on the chart to guide your purchase. Measurements are in inches.
For people who:
- Treat their phone like a suggestion box
- Let calls go to voicemail on principle
- Consider canceling plans a self-care activity
Yeah...this one's you.
Add one more shirt and pretend this was financially responsible.
👉 Free shipping on $72+ ★ Printed in the USA
(Side effects may include coworkers rolling their eyes)
Soft, comfortable apparel made for repeated wear, questionable plans, and leaving early.
Quality garments chosen because your favorite shirt should actually survive being your favorite shirt.
Multiple styles for however much sleeve you're emotionally prepared to deal with.
Printed to order with the inside thoughts you were apparently willing to wear outside.
Comfortable enough to become one of those things you reach for before you've technically decided what you're wearing.
100% Airlume Ring Spun Cotton - The fancy kind. Softer, stronger, won't fall apart. Pre-shrunk so it stays the same size forever.
Lightweight & Breathable - 4.2 oz fabric that's perfect for doing nothing or pretending to be productive.
Retail Fit with Crew Neck - Classic, clean, fits like an actual shirt. Works for the couch or leaving the house.
Ethically Made - Bella+Canvas makes these in the US and internationally without exploiting humans. Fair Labor certified and all that good stuff.
Note: Most are 100% cotton, but some heather colors have polyester blends. Check the product page if you care about specifics.
Reinforced Durability - Double-needle stitching everywhere that matters so your shirt doesn't fall apart after three washes.
Seamless Collar - Quarter-turned so there's no weird crease down the middle. Stays looking normal.
Tear-Away Label - Rip it off, no scratchy tag, no sticky residue. Just comfort.
30-Day Money Back Guarantee - Love it or get your money back. We're not gonna fight you about it.
Printed in the USA - Made and shipped from the US so it actually gets to you this decade.
Internal Review Board (no one asked for this)
Phil (Unhinged Product Gremlin)
"Wore this to a family gathering. Three relatives tried to start conversations, saw the shirt, and slowly backed away like I was a wild animal. Best purchase of my entire antisocial life."
Deborah (HR, Per My Last Email)
"While the message is clear, employees wearing this shirt may appear less enthusiastic about team-building activities."
Legal (Absolutely Not a Lawyer)
"The phrase ‘Currently Avoiding Everyone’ does not legally constitute a permanent refusal to communicate, but expectations should remain appropriately low."
No weird hoops or awkward emails
