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  • Black t-shirt with a sloth holding a coffee cup graphic and 'Caffeinated Sloth Society' text on a white background.
  • Person wearing a black t-shirt with a 'Caffeinated Sloth Society' graphic design.
  • Black t-shirt with a sloth holding a coffee cup graphic and 'Caffeinated Sloth Society' text on a white background
  • Gray t-shirt with a 'Caffeinated Sloth Society' graphic on a white background
  • Black t-shirt with a sloth holding a coffee cup and 'Caffeinated Sloth Society' text on a white background
  • Black t-shirt with a sloth holding a coffee cup graphic and 'Caffeinated Sloth Society' text on a white background.
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Caffeinated Sloth Society T-Shirt

Caffeinated Sloth Society T-Shirt

For when you run on caffeine, spite, and scheduled naps.

$28.95 USD
$34.99 USD $28.95 USD
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Shipping calculated at checkout.

Legend has it the Caffeinated Sloth Society began in 2012, when a sloth accidentally stumbled into a Starbucks, downed a triple espresso, and immediately regretted everything. Members were recruited not through mysterious invitations, but through a shared love of naps interrupted by panic attacks, productivity guilt, and $6 lattes. Today, the Society thrives as a safe haven for anyone who needs three cups of coffee just to log into Zoom, and then another cup to recover from it. Membership perks? None. We’re too tired.

Color
Size

Why You Need This

  • Not a morning person? Perfect.
  • Not a night person either? Still perfect.
  • Basically: for anyone awake against their will.
  • Not a morning person? Perfect.

Fake Reviews

“Finally, merch that understands my hatred for small talk.”
— Introvert Supreme
“Comfort level: slept in it, wore it to brunch, nobody noticed.”
— Sunday Goblin
“Made me feel something. Might’ve been the cotton.”
— Dead Inside But Cozy

Specs (But Make It Petty)

🍜 Ramen-Ready🎲 Dice-Roller Safe🪑 Chair-Slump Endorsed💤 Nap-Optimized

Care Instructions, but honest

Official

  • Turn inside-out.
  • Cold wash.
  • Hang dry.
  • Treat it better than you treat yourself.

Unofficial

  • Laundry is optional.
  • Outfits are suggestions.
  • Society is fake anyway.
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